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Hey all, The General Discussion forum is temporarily closed. Standing in the living room, rest your wiener behind the couch cushion that leans against the backside of the sofa, or you can kneel and slip it under the seat pad. The existential sadness of anyone claiming that a disembodied rubber vag-sleeve is better than having sex with another person is something no Cracked columnist can dare take on without some serious alcohol to fuel the poetic ennui that will follow. Rock Into Your Hand Most people masturbate by moving their hand up and down. It's not really in the ballpark, and sure, some snotty people who think they're better than you will make fun of it. It might feel like someone else is working on your penis until you get off. As many fellows will tell you, about a year or two after you've mastered the hand technique, your mind starts wandering.
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Maybe you have a slice of ham. Next time you start, you will get off very quickly, and the sensation will be extremely intense. He reached for it, grabbed both together, pulled, and suddenly we had nuclear power, iPhones, and Hot Pockets. I agree to the Terms of Service. If you're not picking up what I'm putting down yet, allow me to elucidate. Peel it and remove the fruit or cut the tip off and squirt the inside out, then rinse the rind with warm water and fill it with lube. You don't need to be broke to want to bang stuff found around your pad.
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7 Household Objects That Guys Can Jerk Off With. Safely. | L.A. Weekly

Try to imagine some sound effects, like a grunt of consternation, a chipmunk-like tittering, and the bass growl of a tired and hungry bear. How do you get rid of a fish smell from the penis? Flip the open end over the top and secure with a rubber band or tape so it stays in place. Maybe one day, our monkey ancestor was sitting in his tree, lounging under a palm frond, enjoying some delicious papaya, when some of it slipped and landed on his little monkey dinky.
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Description: Orion Pictures "Live with me if you want to cum. Our ancestors used to put a stick covered in termites in their proto-dicks to get off. The downside to the Autoblow, depending on how you feel about noise, is that it sounds like you're being blown by the factory from the end The Terminator. Use one hand as you normally would, but place the other above or below that one, and use both of them to maintain the motion you need to have an orgasm.

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Views: 1267 Date: 13.03.2016 Favorited: 5 favorites

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